Tag Archives: life reflections

ice cream fixes everything…

27 May

Tonight brings you a blog with a difference (heavily medicated from a hospital bed).botox

After way too many procedures on my poor little vocal folds, I am back again to plump them up just like Bree Edelsein’s boobs or Angelina Jolie’s lips….well maybe not quite THAT much…but you get the picture.

These past 8 voiceless years have sure been a journey; complete with the good ….the bad … and the very very ugly (despite the massive amounts of cosmetic injectables). I’ve met good people, great people, interesting people  a couple of very memorable  jerks.

LOVE to be heardI been  ‘botoxed and collagened’ within an inch of my life (literally once when my airway closed over)… to slow down chaotic muscles and plump up saggy vocal folds …always balanced with a variety of natural therapies like yoga, kinesiology, acupuncture, hypnotherapy and speech therapy …. and yet we are still looking for the winning combination that will make living with a tricky neurological voice disorder more bearable.

So…tonight I am laid back in my 5 star hospital accommodation (no sign of a $7 co-payment in this establishment), with plenty of mind altering pain relief surging through my veins… and feeling a bit melancholy. I am actually feeling very privileged to be in a position to pursue the journey, and wonder what would happen if it were out of my reach like so many others.

But it doesn’t stop me sooking like a 6 year old, whose tonsils have been removed,…and raiding the freezer looking for ice-cream…. of course that it will fix everything.

Oh well …it’s onward and upward !!! There is no option to give up  I want to really be heard again…..(now off to find that ice cream)…I’m 50 Something but not dead yet !

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beaten by technology….and the international date line

8 Mar

Well despite my very best effort and perfect track record so far… My 365 day blog challenge tripped over somewhere between New York City  on March 6th and arriving home in Sydney today March 8th.qantas

While I was prepared for the crazy time travel…what I wasn’t prepared for was a complete technology failure. ARRRGH… Having prepared some (fairly brief and banal) words to post when we had a quick stop in LA… I was shattered to discover that my laptop and phone were BOTH dead and unable to be recovered in the short stop-over. Bugga !!.

So now that the explanation is out of the way. I’m happy to tell you that the flight was good …all 23 hours of it !! and paying a premium for ‘Exit Row’ seats definitely made ALL the difference to these long legs.

It made me reflect on the number of fabulous Americans we met while we were away, who, immediately after asking “how many Aussies REALLY get attacked by sharks when surfing?” …in the next breath said they wanted to visit Australia… but couldn’t ’cause it was just SO far away.

Hello ….NEWSFLASH my American friends!!!!  It is the same distance whichever way you fly (and this was our 3rd visit to USA) so feel free to jump on board, buckle up… and come on down…. I promise to keep the sharks at bay.

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it’s a dogs life

2 Feb

Driving past the local vet I saw the sign for puppy preschool. Now most of us would not argue with the idea of teaching a new dog who the boss is, along with a few basic manners…..but is this obsession with pooch pampering all going a bit too far?

Below the sign for ‘puppy preschool’ was one for ‘puppy primary’ …(who knows what that involves, but guessing it doesn’t include reading and writing)… I can almost cope with this too; EXCEPT this is hot on the heels of seeing adverts for doggie dance classes. Yep … that’s right! Owners and their precious pooches dress up and ‘trip the light fantastic’ (not sure what you would call the moves … but  I can’t imagine too much twirking or hip hop).

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Then there was the puppy parlour …Decked out like a beauty salon, pampered pooches can be washed, fluffed  and flounced with ribbons and bows…all to make the owners feel good before heading off to one of the boutiques to buy a new outfit. Selling all things glitter and bling, these up-market fashion stores even sell shoes for the best dressed canines.

I was first exposed to poncy puppies in New York City’s Central Park a few years back. We saw ‘dog walkers’ taking their four legged charges for their daily exercise wearing diamante collar, soft lace up shoes and often a t-shirt or jacket. This is certainly a long way from our two ‘paddock pooches’, who despite being much loved…. live, and are treated like dogs. 

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it’s never too late to become a pro…

27 Jan

It’s true to say that I have always been fairly average when it comes to ball sports. So I ask myself why  @ ’50 Something’  am I suddenly entertaining the idea of becoming a Pro Golfer?  Well.., perhaps that’s putting the cart before the horse just a little… but I am at least contemplating that I should learn to hit the ball.CAM00074

My experience on the golf course is ‘limited’ to say the least; with the number of games easily counted on one and a bit hands… BUT, I figure learning the game is a reasonably achievable goal for someone of my ‘middle years’….and who knows… I might even like it ( after all I don’t mind walking … AND the smell of cut grass is good, so that’s a great start).

However, today’s trial adventure onto the course highlighted that golf can in fact be a high risk activity. Accompanied by our three  ’20 Something’  companions, Mr ’50 Something’ and I were reminded of the dangers when I spotted the signs warning us of ‘spike bushes, snakes and unstable grounds‘…no doubt meant to keep us from hitting the ball into the scrub (yeah right …as if I have any control over where that ball ends up!)

Needless to say I managed to lose 3 balls to the wilderness, and left them for the snakes … but apart from that I think I did OK for a first effort…It’s just the score that tells a different story.

099Let’s just say I have a little way to go before hitting the Pro-Circuit!

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feeling like a quick enchilada?

19 Jan

There is very little that frustrates me more than rushing to do a quick grocery shop stop, and then not being able to easily locate the things I need.

I reckon I did 3 laps of Coles today scouring the shelves for salad dressing. Nothing special, new or different… just regular Paul Newmans, but do you think I could find it…? In fact I found things that I didn’t even know Coles sold, but for some reason the salad dressing remained elusive.

When I eventually resorted to actually reading the signs above the aisles, it made me wonder who decides what product is worthy of signage. There seemed to be very little rhyme or reason to the items that got top billing …but salad dressing was not one of them.  There were all sorts of things listed, but one in particular had me stumped and more than a bit amused… “Mexican Food”.

I would love to know how high the demand for enchiladas, guacamole or chimichangas  is in North Richmond, but my guess is that more people want salad dressing. Don’t get me wrong, I love tacos and burritos as much as the next person, but I just can’t see how Mexican food got it’s own sign. (I didn’t see anyP1090159 for Italian, Chinese or  French food…)

Anyway, you will be pleased to know that (after a good 15 mins) I eventually located what I was after, without a scrap of help from their store directory;  but at least I will know where to go the next time I get struck by the need for a quick enchilada!

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the fine art of fishing

16 Jan

It’s true to say that ever since I was young, I have liked to challenge convention; not in any huge anti-establishment kind of way, but more an irreverence to accepted practice. As a young adult I was always good at questioning and then stretching the rules (rather than breaking them outright) and the more someone told me ‘this is the way we do it …(whatever ‘IT’ was)’ the more likely I was to find an alternative way to get there.

So it comes as no surprise that from the time I met my now ’50 something’ man, (who considered himself an accomplished fisherman; having been trained in the nuances of the sport by his father) … I have challenged the ‘rules’ of fishing.  Who says the fish don’t bite if it’s windy (surely it doesn’t affect them underwater)… or that you should have a particular type of line with a particular style of hook if you want to catch a particular kind of fish…and then there is the bait… bla bla bla ….on it goes, and suddenly a simple and relaxing pastime becomes fraught with rules.

MY rule is just grab whatever leftovers you have handy (that will stay on your hook), and knock yourself out. As for line and rigging …if it looks good and the hook stays on, then who cares what kind of knots you tie?

Some of my more successful moments have been with apple and chicken, but over the past few days I have managed to score flathead with BBQ’d tomato and basil sausage, and bream with multigrain toast. See…Who said it needs to be complicated?  (although I’m sure my now departed FIL would turn in his grave at the thought …)P1120516

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walking…the rules of engagement

12 Jan

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It’s not an unusual sight these days to see morning walkers out and about, doing their bit to control the bulging waistline; but never is this more evident than the holidaymakers in January on the coast.

All the ‘50 somethings’ with their new-found resolutions, flock to the foreshores for their morning exercise, before heading home for a cooked up brekkie, a rest and a leisurely read of the paper, followed by lunch and a well earned ‘cold one’(if they’re super keen they may have squeezed in a sleep on the beach and an ice-cream beforehand …but of course that’s optional).

The art of the ‘50 something’ morning walk is something worthy of comment. First of all there is the look…no sweaty gym gear for this lot; its fresh joggers, white socks, shorts and t shirt (more often than not, with a matching visor).  Unlike the under 30’s, who are pounding the pavement beside them in singlets with sweat glistening on their rippled bodies (and for whom jogging is as natural as breathing)…Instead, this lot stroll along with a pause here and there to gaze at the marine life or to stop and chat with a ‘fellow walker’… BUT as long as this morning ritual lasts a minimum of 45mins, it’s respectable to go home shower, flop and feel good about yourself.

Then there is the etiquette… the unspoken rules that say; stay to the left, allow the speedier paced to pass, and don’t confuse oncoming (pedestrian) traffic with any sudden movement…or worse still, no movement at all.  Apparently this is MY crime …. frequently accused of ‘not paying attention’ or ‘choosing my line’ too late, I’m beginning to wonder if  the ‘walking police’ will soon insist on us all having a pedestrian licence before setting a jogger on the pavement.

Still it shouldn’t be too big an issue; because for most of us it’s a short lived phenomenon and by February the joggers and visors will be securely packed…ready for next year.

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water-tight …

11 Jan

Before I start today’s trip inside my head just a little background for those of you that have recently joined my 365 day blog challenge.

First of all… ‘the windows’… I discovered one day that lots of my travel photos contained windows… all captured quite by accident. Funny really because I’ve always loved the idea of peeking through windows right on dusk to be a ‘fly on the wall’; not in any creepy kind of way…but I love people, and have always been fascinated by what makes them tick, (so where better to see that than inside their own homes?) .

Anyway … in more recent years since losing my voice, I have wished that people had a clear view through ‘my’ window to see what goes on inside this crazy busy mind (realising that  it’s mostly useless nonsense…) because it’s just too bloody hard to express all this trivia in words. I can manage to get my message across for the ‘essentials’ but the more colourful, detailed minutia of the mind needs a place to escape (before my head bursts).

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Now, while finding something to reflect on every day should be easy … there is just so much going on, that it’s sometimes hard to choose, and that in itself becomes a challenge. So each day is just a snapshot of something quirky, amusing or completely banal that makes its way through the chaos of my mind, and is captured in a few paragraphs of nonsense for you to read …or not.

Today it’s all about hair (a recurring theme – it seems) …but this time from a completely different angle.

Holidaying on the coast I couldn’t help but notice an extremely hirsute 50 something man swimming at the beach, BUT NOT GETTING WET!! What the …? Go Figure!!!

As I watched for over half an hour to see this ‘furry fella’ dive and emerge with little more than a glisten on his profuse and well populated follicles, I resisted the urge to pass on the details of the nearest beauty salon for a quick depilation.  BUT when  I turned my attention to a young bohemian, swimming beside me with a huge head of BONE DRY dreadlocks…. I was stumped… How is it that I look  like a drowned rat (flat and frazzled), while these two guys floating by were seemingly waterproof?

Not fair…I want what they’re having!

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the truth about chickens and dolphins

9 Jan

Today I am embarrassed to admit that despite having spent 55 years on this earth, there are so many things I simply have no idea about.

P1120335Over lunch the conversation turned to the mating habits of chickens …(don’t ask me why), and I realised that I did not have a clue about the process of poultry egg fertilisation….  yet despite the fact that I am a midwife, and can tell you anything you want to know about human reproduction …It seems that when it comes to all things ‘foul’… I’ve got nothing.

Later in the day the topic moved to dolphins. Where?… and how ? DO they sleep? and what ELSE do they get up to? (other than playing and providing endless entertainment for onlookers….and a lucrative business opportunity for anyone with a boat big enough to fill with enthusiastic tourists in order to  take their money in the hope of seeing these giant frolicking  fish oops I mean mammals).

Then there was that amazing rainbow halo around the sun today….making it look both eerie and beautiful, BUT what did it mean???

All I can say is ‘thank god for google’ …and that long gone are the old days of the Funk and Wagnells!