Archive | April, 2014

spinning a story …

30 Apr

I have never pretended to be a naturist or have a very good handle on anything living …(other than people…I like to think). BUT it occurred to me today  just how little I know about spiders.cobweb

Not that I think it is an essential field of study … or that it is even particularly interesting …..BUT this morning I spied some of the biggest cobwebs I have ever seen. Spanning more than 2 meters between trees…they were massive, yet there was not a hint of the creatures responsible for putting them there.

Clearly these massive construction efforts happen overnight, presumably in an effort to trap their prey, but I wonder just where the owners disappear to when the sun comes up ? …Now, while I don’t particularly “like” them, I am not an arachnophobe… BUT all the same, I couldn’t help but keep a sharp eye out  as I passed by these amazing works of art, fearful that we might meet when I least expect it

I also contemplated what a waste of effort for the poor little critters … tomorrow they will have moved on and need to start spinning their homes all over again… I have never thought it before, but its a rough job having 8 legs and hanging around in silk all night.

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29 Apr

OK….  so what’s the story with all the small, rough sawn lumps of masonite nailed to telegraph posts all over town. You know the ones…promising us the world…handwritten (and often poorly spelled ). They usually go something like ….

 “want to earn $80k-$100k working from home?… be your own boss, call me now  and ask me how” 

work from home button

Does anyone ever call?

….I mean as tempting  as in might be to respond to such a classy job advert…full of promise, who in their right mind would ever think that someone with the that level of style and creativity , could help them on the road to wealth ? seriously ???P1130404

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hot pants …

28 Apr

Here I sit, curled up with my laptop, fingers poised  and wondering what to start writing ….and suddenly it hit me… in the worst possible way. hot water bottle

I had just got to thinking I was enjoying the cool nip in the air …The excuse to dust of my favourite hot water bottle, fill it and tuck it in between me and the lounge ready to feel the warmth seep into my bones…

Then instead,  I suddenly had a hot and wet sensation oozing through my pants and making me ..very very uncomfortable ….OUCH!!

I guess everything has a limited life span and sadly rubber is no different… now I best run for the ice packs 😦

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back on the treadmill…

27 Apr

back to work

26 Apr

essay writing

I have hit the critical 2 day mark …so sorry but there are no wise words, pearls of wisdom or nonsense tonight.

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faking it …

25 Apr

I am not a huge TV watcher these days… However the fact that ‘Mr50Something’ loves his telly, means that I get my fair share of the small screen by osmosis; as a consequence,bad-fake-tan I have begun to notice a somewhat disturbing phenomenon… everyone is ORANGE !

Now, I am what you would call ‘fair skinned’ ~ born with a mop of red hair.  I went on to have the freckles and whole deal, then as a teenager I soon became a fan of fake tan (back in the good old streaky spray tan‘Coppertone’ and ‘Sea and Ski’ overnight tan days).

I am still ‘all for’ a natural sunkissed look…BUT for goodness sake these TV presenters that light up the screen with their luminescent orange faces, have got to be kidding! Whoever told them they looked good?

I’m sure it’s made worse by being THAT time of the year that we are all desperately clinging to the last rays of summer, milking every moment before we cover up for winter…but seriously???

Whatever the reason, its not a good look, and makes me wonder about the benefits of black and white TV!

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summing things up…

24 Apr

Picture this… I am in a store waiting to purchase 2 new autumn tops  (that’s not important ~ just wanted to share my bargain), all around the store are signs saying 40% off EVERYTHING, but also on the counter is a small display offering 10% discount to students.

student discountA young man approaches the counter ahead of me and asks the shop assistant how he goes about getting the student discount.

She smiles and replies that there is 40% off EVERYTHING and therefore the student discount does not apply.

Puzzled he asks again … ‘but what do I need to do to  get the 10%?’40 percent

Again she responds calmly and says that all he needs to do is show his student card, HOWEVER today it does not apply because there is 40% of EVERYTHING.

He insisted that he would like to have the student discount because he is a Uni student …and she said … ‘OK that’s fine, just double checking that you would rather have the 10% discount than the 40% storewide discount’?

He stood there, mouth wide and thinking, then after some time replied …’well maybe the 40% would be a better deal… eh’?

Let’s just hope he is not studying mathematics.

 

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there’s a goddess in the laundry…

23 Apr

Today I was playing domestic goddess ! Transported back to my childhood in the 60’s laundrywhen my Mum and Nan managed to fill their entire day with getting the laundry done.

As I have admitted here before …when it comes to laundry I am not a match on my forebears; in fact when it comes to most things domestic … I get by… but I am certainly no Martha Gardener.

Anyway today was a perfect autumnal day, I had a pile of washing AND a pressing assignment to write. Now as many of you have heard me say…there is no better motivation for housework than a looming essay. I managed to get several loads of washing done and hung… then shuffled and rehung…then folded and (no …not yet ironed) while contemplating whether or not to start writing.

Here I am writing to YOU while still thinking about where to start the essay. Good thing I work best under pressure, eh?

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wayfinding gone feral…

22 Apr

Today I met a friend for coffee in an unfamiliar… yet ‘oh so familiar’ shopping mall in Sydney. I say unfamiliar because it is not one I frequent normally… yet familiar because once inside, that are all so ‘same same’.

That is … except for the carpark.carpark

Oh my goodness I felt like I was driving in a foreign country as I tried to negotiate the unfamiliar space, complete with construction work…barriers…one way signs and temporary redirection signs. The markings on the ground were confusing to say the least with arrows having been re-routed… and at one stage I found myself going up the down ramp !!!

wrong wayNow I don’t know a great deal about traffic flow …BUT I was part of a “way-finding strategy working party” (yes I work for a Gov’t Dept)  for a new Health facility …and I know that the signage in this particular car park would have failed miserably on any way-finding measurement scale.

Shame on you Macquarie Centre …lets hope the new look centre is worth all the bingles, road rage, lost cars and frayed nerves.

Here endeth the rant 😉

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round the Aussie block

21 Apr

Well here we are home again after travelling 2600 km around the country block and my mind is overflowing with meaningless trivia ….I love an educational adventure so in the interest of sharing, I’m happy to summarise some of my more useless observations:

  • the smaller the country town ~ the larger the skate park.
  • the number of stars on a hotel/motel sign does not indicate the comfort of the mattress (nor the water pressure in the shower).
  • every country town seems to have a High Street, a Queen Street… and a Commercial Hotel.
  • coastal cows definitely look happier than their inland cousins.
  • Black Rd leads to Green Lake and Green Rd leads to Black Creek.
  • there really is a ‘potato protection’ zone (I’m still not sure what they are scared of)
  • honey bees flat their wings up to 11,000 per second
  • liquorice is made from the root of the liquorice plant  (I’m sure some of you knew that …but I had no idea).

Finally …. we could have travelled across 3 or 4 European countries in the equivalent ‘drive round the Aussie bock’ but would we have had the same open space, country hospitality and endless skies?…..doubtful.

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