Tag Archives: observations

hitting the wrong key….

4 Dec

These past few days , I’ve had a bit of a fascination with….wait for it … ‘keyboards’.comptometrist

Not the musical variety …but the highly functional communication tool that’s allowing me to write this. I have no idea what prompted it  (well actually I might know) … but since tuning in to this fascination … it seems I am being haunted by them…. (keyboards that is).

Since caving to the world of gadgetry and purchasing  my phabulous phablet  last week, I’m reminded that if I’m writing anything longer than 2 lines……..I would rather use a ‘thumbnail dipped in tar’ than type on a touch screen keyboard. It’s silly I know, but there is something comforting knowing that  I can feel and hear the clicking of the keys. …and the tactile aspect is  so much more ‘real’than tapping on a sheet of glass !!

Which brings me to the functional part …how DOES that sheet of glass translate that little ‘tap’  into letters on the screen. I mean …just stop and really think about it ? It is quite amazing technology …but it almost makes me forgive my ‘not so smart’ phone for it’s poor spelling and grammar.

The more you contemplate the humble keyboard the more there is to wonder, ponder and appreciate really….. like ‘why ARE the keys on a qwerty keyboard arranged the way they are’ ? and what key is used the most (tip have a look at the most shiny and faded one) ….. and how often should you actually clean your key board ??? (and how ???)  …..the list goes on.

I began to wonder why I was so fascinated…. and it suddenly occurred to me that it must be genetic. My Mum was a Comptomotrist way back in the 1940’s  ….busily tapping holes in cardboard 8 hours each day …. bet she didn’t use a ‘smart anything’ to help her ….just  good old fashioned  and clunky keys.

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it’s my birthday and I’ll….

21 Oct

…do whatever I want 😉

Around 11.45pm on this day 56 years ago, a somewhat chunky baby with a thick mop of redhead babyred hair fell ( well almost) into the world. …not that I remember it, but it was one of those great stories that my Dad loved to share. (Had I waited just another 15 minutes they wouldn’t have been charged for an extra day in hospital… but no I was in a hurry),  there was no crossing legs to save a few dollars where Mum was concerned.

Anyway the rest is history ….and here we are.

I’ve never been one to worry about age …after all it’s just a number and means very little, BUT I must admit to feeling just a teeny pang at having fallen into the wrong side of  my 5th decade.

55 was fine …neither early 50’s or late 50’s …. but 56 has just tipped the scales to the dark side, and, as was pointed out today …into the next check-box on most surveys.  eeek  (maybe I’ll just lie – rather than be categorised in the 56-70yr age bracket).

Anyway … life is good and certainly better than the alternative …. I’m still 50Something but not dead yet !

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“x” rated landscaping

14 Oct

One of the huge challenges of growing up into a ‘50something’ is learning to accept the person who stares back from the mirror.

I mean …. who IS that with the ‘not-so-taught-skin’, the nipples that now seem to prefer the view of the floor, the thinning eyebrows, the wobbly butt and the thickened waist… not to mention the grey roots ? I think all of us ‘more-than- mid-lifers’   are familiar with, and happy to talk about these fairly confronting changes … but the one sign of ‘maturity’ that we tend not to discuss …is the greying of our pubes. (I told you this was “x” rated)

pubespubes 2

from this                                                                          to this

Over the weekend I shared many giggles about all things aging with my ‘50something’ friend ….and this topic soon came up. We agreed that there is no greater indicator that you are getting old, than thinning-grey pubic hair. I mean what can you do to disguise it ??? hair dye seems a little extreme and probably not real effective given the rapid rate of follicle replacement ….. Getting rid of it altogether ? well that’s an option I guess, but there is definitely the pain factor ….and then regrowth ….PLUS the fact that our skin aint as tough as it used to be …..so fronting up for a Brazilian may result in more than just the embarrassment of bearing all to some gorgeous young thing who is about to see just how old you really are!!!

Landscaping trends are a definite age defining fashion statement.

There are those (around our tender ages) that are happy to settle for the summertime edge trim … a ‘bit of a one-go’ with either the wax or razor to keep any ‘strays’ under control when at the beach or poolside…Yet our younger generations are much more likely to make their fashion statement by whipping it all (or most of it) off entirely….to achieve a pre-pubescent look (that I personally find a bit disturbing).

It’s a fascinating topic but not normally one that gets much air-time …. so I’m happy to have thrown the gauntlet to all of you to embrace whatever fashion takes your fancy …. we may be 50Something … but we’re not dead yet.

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all in a days work …

9 Oct

I feel like the last few posts have been all about ME…and to avoid becoming self indulgent I sense the need to get back to tackling the big issues.

So tonight I’m wondering about our men (and women) in blue…Our enforcers of law and order…our keepers of the peace …our very own NSW Police Force.  Now I am not about to criticise, they have a tough and at times dangerous job to do ….BUT you wouldn’t have known that today. pedestrian

On my drive through Sydney  I noticed ‘gangs’ off 2 or 3 Officers strategically located on busy city street corners….watching then pouncing on unsuspecting pedestrians who stray from the allocated road crossing, then writing tickets for their ‘criminal’ behaviour. I know its about safety, and that rules are in place to help us all … but seriously ??? who was left on ‘bank robber alert’, or ready to respond to an emergency??

Having pondered the value of this pedestrian blitz…I then left the city, smack bang in the middle of the peak hour traffic. Driving at a snail’s pace in bumper to bumper traffic on the freeway, I passed a number of Police Officers with their radar set up …..

police radarNow you tell me …. does that seem like a reasonable use of taxpayers money, when, for 20km of my trip I did not exceed 50kph in a 110kph stretch of road?  It was impossible to come even close to the speed limit ~ let alone go over it in that short space…..YET I passed 4 patrol cars parked obscurely so as to avoid detection, each one clearly on a mission to catch speedsters ….. BUT WHY during peak hour traffic? it makes no sense at all.

Having given this dilemma some thought …it makes me wonder what they actually hope to achieve…. I mean here we had 4 Officers sitting on the side of the freeway in the vain HOPE that someone might exceed the speed limit …. or perhaps they just wanted some peace and quiet and a bit of  ‘time out’.

I wonder …..

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time to come out of the closet…

7 Oct

The warm weather has arrived and with it a need to switch into a summer wardrobe …which means it’s time to kick off the boots and slip on the strappy sandals.

But here’s the thing… I have a confession to make.. it’s time to fess up, you see I have really embarrassing ankles.

They are not the regular cankle variety where the shape is continuous from calf to foot, but
canklesmore of the   “OMG you have hernias on your feet” kind of look, and the strappy sandal becomes quite an issue if not chosen wisely.

Winter is a blessing because boots hide a multitude of sins… but bring on the summer footwear and suddenly I become acutely aware of my muffin tops.

I’ve spoken to a few ‘professionals’ who have drawn blanks, in fact one Physio giggled and said he had ‘not ever seen anything quite like it’ …. mmm helpful (not).

Now, while I know there are much bigger issues …. like solving poverty and achieving world peace…  I wonder what the chances are of having a spot of liposuction (if in fact it is a fatty deposit …not a weirdly ruptured muscle … but who’d know??)… OR perhaps I’m a candidate for “Embarrassing Bodies”

Anyway I feel much better having gone public and would love to know if others share this bizarre affliction and what you do to disguise it.

I may be 50Something but we all deserve to be proud of our  ankles….. don’t we ??CAM00242

 

 

 

back on the boobs ….

2 Oct

Staying on theme ….today I went bra-shopping.

Honestly, I would normally rather have my top lip waxed than go through the torture of finding a well fitting bra…. BUT that said it was a lot better today than the time I tore my calf muscle while being fitted. (Yep bra…true story you can read all about that exciting event right here … it makes me laugh every time I think back…despite the agony at the time). …

But back to today… it was great to see that the racks are now chockablock full of gelato colours and gorgeous styles to suit all shapes and sizes. There were minimisers, maximisers, push-up, half cups, underwire,no wire,chicken fillets, soft cups, t shirt bras .. bla bla bla ….  it’s endless and mindboggling. They all fit differently  ….and given that you can only take 3 at a time into the fitting room… it’s a slow and tedious exercise. BUT I eventually won !!

My next challenge is figuring how to keep the new strapless dress up, and in place …. but that’s a story for another day.

I’m 50Something …but not dead yet !

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pass me a neck brace …

22 Sep

I’m beginning to wonder if I am ‘slop made’…or if other people suffer in silence regarding today’s bizarre issue.

Basically my problem is that my head doesn’t fit on a headrest. There I have admitted it, after years if thinking I am a misfit or have some kind of deformity…. (both of which may be true)….I’ve gone public.

My ‘issue’ has been a long standing one, but it was reinforced this last weekend, both on my plane trip and then in the car. In both cases I was tired but could not relax and let my head rest on the headrest without tilting back at a ridiculous near 90deg angle (well, I’m not so good with geometry, but you get the picture), leaving me with a stiff and sore neck today.

Over the past years I have contemplated this from time to time, and wondered if it relates to my posture. BUT I have checked the direction of my neck, and while it’s not perfect, it’s certainly aiming up ~ not forward like a turtle, which would at least explain something.  I know that the head support on the drivers seat is a precaution against whip-lash…rather than for having a nap while in control of the vehicle, but as a passenger, surely it’s not unreasonable to close your eyes and recharge the batteries while the road noise (or hum of the jet engines) puts you to sleep.

neck rest

Perhaps this is what I need  …

These days I am a bit more prepared (mostly) and when the trip is a reasonable length, I use a neck pillow… but it doesn’t stop me wondering who the designers of these ‘added comforts’ really are …and whose body they use for the template. (and whether or not I am the odd one in this topic lol)

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cubicle complaints …

19 Sep

For some reason tonight takes me back inside the ladies loo. I’m beginning to wonder why I do so much ‘wondering’ in there…. but it can be a fascinating place sometimes.

I popped into the poolside facility at the moderately swanky (as opposed to really swanky)conference hotel, and was stunned to find several shower cubicles alongside the loos; each complete with every pampering potion you could ever need… shampoos, conditioners, body wash …you name it, it was there. Then there were hair dryers and straighteners plugged and in ready to go at each vanity basin ….and …wait for it … 2 sets of uber-modern bathroom scales,  one on each side of the vast tiled space.

While I wondered who would really use those scales…I was impressed with the effort and the decor of the whole place.

loo paperUNTIL …..I finally dragged myself away from all this fancy stuff…and went to the loo, (fortunately for just a quick visit), only to discover there was not one square of toilet paper..arrrgh!!

Surely if the interior designer had gone to all that effort to accommodate every whim, they could have installed some sort of facility for an emergency supply of loo paper (or just left a spare roll within reach – I mean, how hard can that be ?).

 

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what would Colonel Sanders think ?

2 Sep

Today I had a conversation with one of my rural  ‘study buddies’ that made me stop and wonder ….

We were talking about life on the land and some of it’s trickier aspects, particularly in relation to the weather. There is no doubt that a farming life is not for the faint hearted. Day in… day out, the work is relentless and so often thankless, but then I got to thinking about the animals…in particular the chooks.cold chook

My friend was telling me about a recent and sudden cold snap that saw temps plummet to -6deg, unprecedented in the area. She went out to feed the chooks only to find their water frozen solid yet THEY were busy clucking and laying like it was any other day.

How IS that ? I mean their frail little bodies have hardly any insulation, not to mention their scrawny legs and feet…. and while they wear their feather coat, it’s hardly made for sub frozen chookszero conditions.

Then there are the eggs, what stops them from freezing solid? I know that they are being sat on … but seriously those outside temps cannot be good for them.

Clearly there are a range of farm animals that need to deal with these adverse conditions …but somehow my mind could not go past the image of a small frozen hen trying to please it’s owner despite the potential frostbite…I’m guessing that the supermarket freezer cabinet would almost be a relief.

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marketing? or pain in the bum ? …

18 Aug

marketingThis past week I seem to have attracted a series of  mis-hits from the world of advertising… lets call it marketing gone wrong.

It seems to me that everywhere we look or listen we are being encouraged to buy or try something that we either don’t want, don’t need ….or don’t know exists. But I guess that’s not new.

What is new (ish) though, is the bombardment of marketing emails and sms messages… I feel like it’s almost time to change my email address just to get off the marketing merry-go-round…. but then I think why should I ? (that’s kind of like moving house because the letterbox is full of junk-mail).

 

But … on a slightly different note, this week I have had some very odd telephone calls.

Odd because:

  • I don’t use the telephone except in rare instances that I am the one to initiate…                                                            
  • two of these calls came to my workplace (which happens to be a government department).

Let me explain ….

Two days in a row last week, I had long winded (recorded) messages left on my mobile phone voicemail… (who on earth records their message to record ???) Both messages were from my industry Union, telling me that I am “the backbone” of my workforce and that I should get behind the latest Union initiatives…

How ridiculous, I mean this man doesn’t know me… and how can he be sure that I am a good worker ? and how dare he presume that I want to waste my money replaying his long winded message ? …. not to mention that they are spending Union funds on this crazy telephone campaign (last time I checked there were over 35,000 members… so that’s a lot of mobile phone calls).. mmm I wonder if we are ALL the backbone of  the industry ???

The other odd calls came to the office – again I don’t ‘do the phone’ … but on seeing the confusion of the  colleague  that did answer, I was compelled to ‘step in’ and rescue him (then wondered why I did ).

Now I’m not able to share exactly what I do … (it’s top secret lol) … but lets just say I work in an ‘under the radar’ program.. a fabulous, but discreet service that works on a ‘need-to-know’ basis.

So… you can imagine my surprise when the insistent voice on the end of the line, was giving me the hard sell on advertising ……. via SHOP_A_DOCKETS !!!  Having waited till the man eventually drew breath, I tried to explain that we are a service that does not advertise… but he went on …..and on …and on…..with all the reasons that we should , until finally I gave up and hung up on him.

The following day a similarly strange call came… but this time from the Police Department …They were FUNDRAISING!!!!!! What the ??? As I said…. we are a government department too….. so how on earth does that work???

Finally … I was driving to work this morning and I spotted a bus whose entire side was dedicated to advertising an MRI Scanning Clinic …. It left me wondering just how many people would see that bus and suddenly have the urge to visit that clinic for an MRI ????

Now I did a quick search to see what the meaning of marketing actually is. It’s true to say that there are as many definitions as there are poor examples of it …. but from 72 Marketing Definitions I took a select few (below) as ‘food for thought’ …. and have to say that it serves to confirm my first impressions – I have been the victim of multiple and epic marketing bloopers !

x

  • Intuitive by design, marketing matches the right message/cause to the right person
  • Marketing is meeting the needs and wants of a consumer.
  • Marketing is creating irresistible experiences that connect with people personally and create the desire to share with others
  • Marketing has little to do with the service provider and everything to do with the customer

mmmmm …curious …. very very curious….

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